A Mirror Factory
To Julia: You really started something!
My summer has been strange, TASPers. I feel as if the person I am has changed a bit, and not really for the better. During this time, I also find myself asking myself questions that have always bothered me, questions which I have never bothered to confront.
First of all, this is my first summer without anything to do. Yes, it seems that in order to balance out the impending excitement of college life, my summer has become analogously dull. All I do is sleep, work, drink coffee, and work out. Yes, dears, I would like to say that I have been reading like mad or trying to learn Vietnamese or having awesome conversations with intelligent people.
I would like to say this, but this is not the case. I spend the majority of my time these days trying to sell a woman a cheap pair of sunglasses or plucking my eyebrows or pirating hip-hop music from the internet. I watch more tv than ever before, and not quality tv. I watch reruns of late 90's sitcoms and sometimes Elimidate. I have become, esssentially, an anti-intellectual.
This makes me uncomfortable as it forces me to question exactly who I am. I say I love to write, but seldom find time to do it anymore. I like to think of myself as interesting and perceptive, but the majority of things I say these days involves such shallow, generic things as clothing or electronics.
I miss feeling creative and alive. Or do I? This summer has its share of creature comforts. The television relaxes me, doesn't make me question my intelligence or values, doesn't make me uncomfortable. There is no deep comtemplation involved in buying a new outfit...
I apologize for what I have become. I suspect that my college classes will pull me out of this intellectual morass whether I like it or not. I can only hope it will.
Drop me a line if you guys ever want to. I can always turn the television off.
love,
josh
ps: I am excited and all, but deep down I have a lot of fear that I will feel very inferior at college.
My summer has been strange, TASPers. I feel as if the person I am has changed a bit, and not really for the better. During this time, I also find myself asking myself questions that have always bothered me, questions which I have never bothered to confront.
First of all, this is my first summer without anything to do. Yes, it seems that in order to balance out the impending excitement of college life, my summer has become analogously dull. All I do is sleep, work, drink coffee, and work out. Yes, dears, I would like to say that I have been reading like mad or trying to learn Vietnamese or having awesome conversations with intelligent people.
I would like to say this, but this is not the case. I spend the majority of my time these days trying to sell a woman a cheap pair of sunglasses or plucking my eyebrows or pirating hip-hop music from the internet. I watch more tv than ever before, and not quality tv. I watch reruns of late 90's sitcoms and sometimes Elimidate. I have become, esssentially, an anti-intellectual.
This makes me uncomfortable as it forces me to question exactly who I am. I say I love to write, but seldom find time to do it anymore. I like to think of myself as interesting and perceptive, but the majority of things I say these days involves such shallow, generic things as clothing or electronics.
I miss feeling creative and alive. Or do I? This summer has its share of creature comforts. The television relaxes me, doesn't make me question my intelligence or values, doesn't make me uncomfortable. There is no deep comtemplation involved in buying a new outfit...
I apologize for what I have become. I suspect that my college classes will pull me out of this intellectual morass whether I like it or not. I can only hope it will.
Drop me a line if you guys ever want to. I can always turn the television off.
love,
josh
ps: I am excited and all, but deep down I have a lot of fear that I will feel very inferior at college.
posted by Josh at 1:39 AM
2 Comments:
Join the club of summertime slackers. Though I started reading Faulkner like crazy in some ridiculous effort to redeem myself from sloth, I've found that 1)such efforts lead only to failure, and 2)summertime sloth ain't so bad. Neither are late '90s sitcoms, or even Elimidate. You won't be any less prepared for college if you don't learn Vietnamese in the next month, and believe me, you have no cause to fear being left behind my your future classmates. Sell your sunglasses in peace. I'm learning to take my own advice, and it's surprisingly effective in increasing general peace of mind. Look on the bright side: at least you get paid for some of your time.
good ole reading Hesse. Just finished Magister Ludi. I've also spent a lot of time not learning esperanto, if that's any consolation.
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